


Match made in Heaven?

by FaithlessBex



Series: Holy Fuck [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cas is protective and suspicious, Dean and Raphael are married, M/M, Sam's POV, Sam's an amused little shit, third person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-11 22:26:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7909909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FaithlessBex/pseuds/FaithlessBex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or, more accurately, Dean and Raphael have come back to the bunker after their accidental, drunken marriage.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Match made in Heaven?

Sam Winchester was amused. Cas was less so, but when an archangel that you went to war with was alive and apparently married to one of your closest friends, he supposed the angel was justified. Still. The entire situation was too funny not to keep watching.

“You really think you can survive on this sort of food, Dean?” Raphael asked, arms crossed as he stared between the greasy diner to-go bag and the older Winchester. Dean looked at Sam, eyes almost pleading with him to back him up but he stayed quiet, hands raised. He’d been telling Dean to eat better for years, he wasn’t about to stop him.

“Traitor. Look, Raph-” Sam raised an eyebrow. It was one thing when Dean had come back from his few week solo trip with an archangelic husband in tow, but a whole nother thing to hear that he already had a nickname he accepted. “I’ve lived this long and now if I have a heart attack or something, you can just save me. One of my perks.”

“I’ll let you suffer to the edge of painful death.” But there was no venom in Raphael’s voice. “Be careful or I’ll decide I like your brother more than you. He’s never done anything to me and he eats healthier than you.”

Dean squinted. “Not funny dude. I’m not being sister wife to my brother.”

Sam choked. The archangel’s eyebrow rose in his direction for a moment before waving a hand. “I promise not to accidentally marry your brother so long as you don’t do the same.”

Cas seemed to jolt back into reality at the comment, staring at them with a frown. “How did you accidentally get married?”

The couple shared a look, seeming to communicate silently before Raphael sighed. “Shots.”

Now Sam burst into laughter, lowering himself into a chair. “You guys got drunk then got hitched? Damn, shoulda guessed it would go that way.”

“Yeah yeah, laugh it up. Something wrong Cas?”

The angel was staring at his brother suspiciously. It was obvious by the way Raphael was staring right back that they hadn’t come close to getting along. It had only been a day, though. “For you to have become inebriated enough to do something like that, it would be enough to kill a human.”

Sam frowned, looking over to the archangel again. Dean was – surprisingly – unconcerned.

“Unless I was drinking a non-human alcohol that could kill a human in a single shot. Which I was. I am not here to be your enemy, Castiel, I am here because for some reason, Dean Winchester asked me to come.”

“Cas, come on, let’s go take a walk.” Dean said abruptly, standing and grabbing him by the arm. “Sammy, can you show Raph around?”

And then he was alone with his new brother in law. “So… You and Dean, huh?”

Raphael regarded him quietly, posture slipping slightly. “You disapprove?”

Sam looked away, staring around the bunker. “I mean… I don’t know you apart from the fact that you killed Cas once and went to war against him to start up the apocalypse again. Not the best impressions.”

A soft laugh left the archangel. “I suppose that’s accurate. But. I was mistaken, Samuel. I just wanted to have my brother back, I’m sure you understand how that feels.” He did. God, did he know. “And I do care for Dean. It’s unconventional circumstances. If it makes you feel better, just consider me a source of extra knowledge and an asset. You three get injured enough for my abilities to be necessary, after all.”

Sam expression shifted into confusion until realization dawned on him. “Lore says Raphael is the archangel of-”

“Healing. And young lovers, interestingly enough.” He said dryly. Any other comments were cut off by the door opening again, letting in a soaked Dean and Castiel. “Do I even _want_ to know?”

“Storm came in. Not one of yours then?” Dean asked, stripping out of his outer shirt. Sam noticed, to his chagrin, how Raphael seemed to straighten at that. Gross. For an ancient being, he was really not subtle at all.

“Yes, because I would call a storm just so you and Castiel would get soaked.”

“Yeah yeah, Raph. I’m gonna get a shower then hit the hay.”

“Noted.”

Cas stopped in front of Raphael, scowl slowly fading into a resigned expression. Raphael nodded in understanding and held a hand out. Cas took it. “I will not harm a hair on either of their heads, and I will not raise my sword against you.”

“Try it and I kill you.” They let go of each other and then Cas was gone down the hall, turning a different direction than Dean had.

“Uh, good night.” Sam said, suddenly awkward in the situation. “You and Dean, can you just… try to keep it down?”

“You have my word, Samuel.”

Sam laughed, pausing at the door. “Just Sam, Raphael.”


End file.
